5AM (1):
- In the news this
morning: Kim Kardashian is releasing a book.
- Is an asteroid
the size of the Statue of Liberty on a collision course for Earth?
- Barack’s entire
M.O. is to direct the public’s attention away from him and onto things he deems
more ‘sinister’. In reality, he’s the terrorist.
- The average
family only spends about half an hour together per day.
5AM (2):
- Sage advice: Be
careful what you demand. Aaron Hernandez learned this the hard way.
- A Florida man
thought it would be a great idea to land his flying bicycle on the Capitol
lawn.
6AM (1):
- There are a lot
of different ways to say “meanwhile.” Many news anchors love to use the phrase
“in other news…”
- There are guys in
our military that have had their arms, legs and brains blown out, but Barack
will remind you that they ‘volunteered for it’.
6AM (2):
- Kids today get
too much of a self esteem boost from home. Once they get out into the real
world, they end up shocked that things aren’t simply handed to them.
6AM (3):
- Producer Ken went
out to the Communist convention in Houston yesterday to speak to kids that
‘demand’ they are worth $15/hr. Audio coming up.
- Parody: Do you
want another spineless mouthpiece that ‘speaks for the people?’ Vote for this
ass clown.
- Hillary was on
the prowl yesterday in her van. She hit up several factories to show the world
that she’s just a ‘regular gal.’
- Fox News revealed
that Hillary Clinton is travelling with an entire film crew in an effort to
document her interactions with common people.
6AM (4):
- Bad news: If you
thought the future was going to be bright, think again.
- Audio: Is this
man the future President of America?
- The sports
stations hate when we cover sports. Think about how we would feel if the sports guys started running their
mouths about politics…
7AM (1)
- Parody: Fishing
with Morgan Freeman
- This day in
history
- Many liberals
believe that it’s far past due for a woman to be the face of the $20 bill. How
much would this devalue the bill?
7AM (2):
- Street Audio:
Part 1 - Producer Ken hit the streets to speak with the Communist party
fighting for $15/hr.
7AM (3):
- Bill Orielly’s
producer went out and asked liberals what they thought of the Republican
presidential candidates.
- How often do you
go to church? You may not know that the words to “Jesus Loves the Little
Children” have been changed.
7AM (4):
- Street Audio:
Part 2 - Producer Ken hit the streets to speak with the Communist party
fighting for $15/hr.
- Audio: Milton
Friedman – The world runs on individuals chasing their dreams
8AM (1):
- Street Audio:
Part 3 - Producer Ken hit the streets to speak with the Communist party
fighting for $15/hr.
- There’s a
legitimate reason for the term “useful idiot”
- Calls – George
wants to move election day to April 16th
- Emails – Wes is
listening all the way from India.
- We live in a
nation of children; all most people want is to have a political version of
their Mommy and Daddy.
8AM (2):
- A Mexican town is
offering tourists the ‘thrill’ of a border crossing reenactment.
- We’re told that
there’s an operational ISIS training camp just miles from the US-Mexico border.
- Parody: Want to
party like Pit Bull and eat tacos all day? Join the ISIS/MS-13 employee
exchange program.
- Calls
8AM (3):
- 5 Random Facts
- A Florida man
went to an emergency room demanding someone give him an enema.
- Aaron Hernandez
will be going to prison just 3 miles from the field that he made his $44
million.
- Taser Report
8AM (4):
**
- A condom company
has made a new female condom that guarantees women an orgasm every time.
- Street Audio:
Part 4 - Producer Ken hit the streets to speak with the Communist party
fighting for $15/hr.
9AM (1):
- Celebrity
Birthdays
- Dead singer Selena
will be going back on tour… albeit in hologram form.
9AM (2):
- Fox News went
live with the Aaron Hernandez trial yesterday.
- Parody: Play
Grand Theft Auto NFL edition
- Mortal Combat ‘X’
is out this week. The game contains the first gay gaming character.
- Police in
Birmingham, AL got a note about a suspicious package. After sending over a bomb
robot the team discovered it was simply an Easter egg.
- Would you guess
who paid for Hillary Clinton’s ‘Scooby’ van? Turns out that you did.
- If Hillary isn’t
a government official, why are tax payers responsible for paying for her
limousine?
9AM (3):
- Why does food
taste better when it’s made by someone else? Maybe it has to do with our racist
genetics…
- Jim Morrison was
probably a time traveler. After all, he predicted the advent of rap music.
- Word to the
unwise: Don’t light a cigarette in your car after cleaning your seats with
rubbing alcohol.
- Have you ever put
your foot in a Croc?
9AM (4):
- Every once in a
while there’s an ass that needs to be smacked.
- If Hillary
Clinton’s ass was spanked more in her college days, would she still be the bitch
she is now?
- The price is
right for the W&J app – it’s free!
