Home
HomeAbout The ShowShow NewsListen NowListen NowContact

January 7th, 2010
Activists Missing After Declaring “War on Leather” at Motorcycle Rally

Johnstown, PA (GlossyNews) – Local and state police scoured the hills outside rural Johnstown, Pennsylvania, after reports of three animal rights activists going missing after attempting to protest the wearing of leather at a large motorcycle gang rally this weekend. Two others, previously reported missing, were discovered by fast food workers “duct taped inside several fast food restaurant dumpsters,” according to police officials.

“Something just went wrong,” said a still visibly shaken organizer of the protest. “Something just went horribly, horribly, wrong.”

The organizer said a group of concerned animal rights activist groups, “growing tired of throwing fake blood and shouting profanities at older women wearing leather or fur coats,” decided to protest the annual motorcycle club event “in a hope to show them our outrage at their wanton use of leather in their clothing and motor bike seats.” “In fact,” said the organizer, “motorcycle gangs are one of the biggest abusers of wearing leather, and we decided it was high time that we let them know that we disagree with them using it…ergo, they should stop.”

According to witnesses, protesters arrived at the event in a vintage 1960’s era Volkswagen van and began to pelt the gang members with balloons filled with red colored water, simulating blood, and shouting “you’re murderers” to passers by. This, evidently, is when the brouhaha began.

“They peed on me!!!” charged one activist. “They grabbed me, said I looked like I was French, started calling me ‘La Trene’, and duct taped me to a tree so they could pee on me all day!”

“I…I was trying to show my outrage at a man with a heavy leather jacket, and he…he didn’t even care. I called him a murderer, and all he said was, ‘You can’t prove that.’ Next thing I know he forced me to ride on the back of his motorcycle all day, and would not let me off, because his girl friend was out of town and I was almost a woman.”

Still others claimed they were forced to eat hamburgers and hot dogs under duress. Those who resisted were allegedly held down while several bikers “farted on their heads.”

Police officials declined comments on any leads or arrests due to the ongoing nature of the investigation, however, organizers for the motorcycle club rally expressed “surprise” at the allegations.

“That’s preposterous,” said one high-ranking member of the biker organizing committee. “We were having a party, and these people showed up and were very rude to us. They threw things at us, called us names, and tried to ruin the entire event. So, what did we do? We invited them to the party! What could be more friendly than that? You know, just because we are all members of motorcycle clubs does not mean we do not care about inclusiveness. Personally, I think it shows a lack of character for them to be saying such nasty things about us after we bent over backwards to make them feel welcome.”

When confronted with the allegations of force-feeding the activists meat, using them as ad hoc latrines, leaving them incapacitated in fast food restaurant dumpsters, and ‘farting on their heads,’ the organizer declined to comment in detail. “That’s just our secret handshake,” assured the organizer.


Back

Comments:


Tahlia - 2014-11-21
yea, that was rather sudedn. I always enjoyed hell for leather, but paying for a blog is just not the right way to go. It is a lot of work to create original content and keep a website constantly updated and fresh, but there are other more successful ways to go about generating some revenue.He may well get some people signing up this month for his content, but these people will eventually start to drop off and he wont get any new people as they wont know what they are missing anyway. I have seen it happen before a few times. On my blog I sell T-shirts which is far from original, but it pays the hosting fees and other costs. To be honest though I would make the site anyway without any revenue as it generates work, acts as a portfolio, notebook and is pretty much a hobby too.I wish him the best of luck, but chances are within 6 months he will either be undoing the subscription thing or fading away as he loses visitors and the community he has worked so hard to build up.derestricted.com http://wkzfgfehmq.com [url=http://duxxlzwctf.com]duxxlzwctf[/url] [link=http://truotyztd.com]truotyztd[/link]
by Tahlia

Kikil - 2014-11-18
forex broker The heart of your wrtinig while sounding agreeable at first, did not work well with me after some time. Somewhere within the paragraphs you were able to make me a believer but only for a while. I still have a problem with your leaps in logic and one mi http://ueysswlbu.com [url=http://eswrui.com]eswrui[/url] [link=http://mnkmwrua.com]mnkmwrua[/link]
by Kikil

Isabela - 2014-11-16
over the last 26 years funding itneuieiqs have caused the cta to increase fares and cut services, resulting in reduced, access to much needed transit services, less employment opportunities, and lower property values in predominatly minority neighborhoods.
by Isabela



Submit a comment

Website & Contents © Walton & Johnson | Terms of Use | Privacy Policy | Contact Us

Powered by BubbleUp, Ltd.

W&J on Twitter.comW&J on Facebook.com